A Sad Farewell to my Pre-baby Boobs

I do not have a full length mirror in my bathroom. This is a blessing and a curse. I’m grateful I do not have to see my ghostly jiggly body in all its glory every time I get out of the shower, however it also allows me to avoid everything happening below my neck. Unfortunately my mother-in-law has the worlds biggest mirror in her guest bathroom and this past weekend I was forced to face reality. Let’s just say: Yikes.
Now I know from getting dressed every day that my stomach isn’t, shall we say, “taught”, nor are my legs what they used to be. But what gave me a big surprise on this particular viewing was my boobs. Where did they go? Why are they halfway down my rib cage? How did they go from rounded globes to flappy pancakes without me even noticing? I’ve never cared much about these melons of mine before, probably because they were decent shape and size, but this is a whole new world. I’m incredibly proud of the fact that I breast fed my daughter for 16 months as Lord knows it is not easy so I guess these sandbags are my badges of courage? What a lame prize.  There is a joke in there about a booby prize but I just can’t get there today.
What can you even do about your boobs? If I gain weight, I can (in theory) diet and exercise. Wrinkles? Slap on some retinol and research chemical peels. But boobs are a different story. To assist with these guys, I did go to Nordstrom for a bra fitting courtesy of my mom who was horrified that I had been wearing the same nude nursing bra daily for 16 months and continued to wear despite no longer nursing. #cheap #lazy This $70 bra has done wonders and I will probably wear it daily until the wire pops out or the straps sag and my mom takes me in again. But what I really want is something that can bring these gals back to their days of glory. When I could rock a white (!) triangle bikini from Target without fear or shame while wearing some early 2000’s sunglasses. Oh, the good old days.  For all your sakes, after photos not included. 1929429_83223666806_3920571_n.jpg

2 thoughts on “A Sad Farewell to my Pre-baby Boobs

  1. You are not alone! I constantly complain to my husband and gfs about my boobs being so sad and how they moved even further south after baby #2. I finally threw out my nursing bras that I had been rocking with BOTH boys (yikes!) and invested in legit bras… but I seriously have to like scoop the ladies up into them and arrange them into place. Why wasn’t I warned about this ahead of time?? Not that much would have changed, but still!


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