Bachelorette Recap: NYC Edition

You guys, I’m the worst!! By the time I remembered the turn the Bachelorette on, it was already halfway over. 7pm is WAY too early for a show to begin–my darn baby hasn’t even gone to bed yet.
I apparently missed Clint getting kicked off, JJ turning on Clint, Clint responding by saying “I’m going to [effing] kill you”, Kaitlyn canceling the rose ceremony and then a rap battle in front of Doug E. Fresh. It was a jam packed hour and way more exciting than the hour I watched. Found this for you peeps though…
https://www.whipclip.com/embed/92zpq
Anyway…when I turned it on Kaitlyn was getting her hair done by Ashley S. and they were drinking mimosas. That sounds like my dream day. Bring me more Ashley S. Cut to Kaitlyn making out with Nick on the corner like four blocks from where I used to live. It’s unclear how he showed up or why, but she seems into it. I don’t trust him whatsoever. Cue my husband saying that he thinks that Nick joining the crew is unfair. I agree.
nick and kaitlyn
Kaitlyn went on a date with Jared to the Met, which was pretty awesome. Remember last year when the girls had to spend like a week in Dubuque, Iowa and the most exciting place they went was the Badlands. They really got the shaft.Except for Ashley S. She thought they were in Mesa Verde.  Kaitlyn spent the whole date thinking about Nick, which is kind of a dick move. Jared wrote/read her a poem. It was lame. K’s response was “Game over”, but in a good way (?) as she then gave him the rose. I would have said “Game over” and then peaced his little ratty face out. But then I would have missed out on a sweet helicopter ride around the Statue of Liberty.
K then informs all the dudes that Nick is moving in and will be joining in the rose ceremony for the night. They are all annoyed and one guy says “There are tons of guys out there. When does it stop?” Good point. Also, one of the dudes is wearing hotel slippers which I love.
Kaitlyn takes a handful of dudes on a group date and walks into the set for Aladdin. Tim and I agree that we would totally go see that musical. Come to Chicago Aladdin! Whoever wins the date gets to make their Broadway debut on the show that night. Stressful as all get out. The boys are good sports about dancing AND they get to shoot out of the floor which looks like the most fun ever. Most of them are terrible singers. Joe makes up the words. Ian is pretty good. Chris “Cupcake” clearly has done high school musicals. Everyone makes fun of him, but he ultimately is chosen. He is so excited to “be on Broadway..and to perform..in Aladdin!” Oh, and also hang with Kaitlyn. Joshua is disappointed, and says that when he was mad at home he used to punch hay bales. Heart eyes for Joshua.

Before they go on stage, Cupcake holds Kaitlyn and tells her they need to stand in silence and appreciate it. Terrible. Then they kiss. He looks ridic in his Aladdin costume, but his eyeliner is on point.
 They were on stage for approximately six seconds and stood awkwardly. Chris says Kaitlyn did real good. She’s a great stander. Then they head to a roof to see the Times Square NYE ball, which Chris calls a “sacred place”. Hmmm…He gets a rose. Show ends with Nick walking into a room full of dudes. Duh..duh…duh.
Side notes:
-Kaitlyn has perpetual duck lips. Too many fillers.
-Brit and Brady are still fake dating. And wearing matching all black outfits with skinny jeans. e says it has been one of the most beautiful times in my life and she responds with a blank stare and “yeah”. That’s going to last.
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One thought on “Bachelorette Recap: NYC Edition

  1. I believe Chris also referred to the NYE ball as being the center of the world/universe. Have to call your bs on that one Cupcake.

    Like

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